my husband married another woman islammy husband married another woman islam

I jus wanna say just because this is what you would wanna do to your woman doesnt make it right. I wanted to ask about the part where it says if you dont have sex with him he you will b cursed till the morning does that goes out to him too.. Like if the wife wanted to have sex and he didnt doesnt he get cursed too ?? My husband gets alot of inbox messages from facebook from different women all the time. the guy has duty to keeping his wife well comforted before he even thinks selfishly about his own satisfaction. Search it yourself. Women indeed isnt something sex slave,and if she denies to have then whats the big deal? The men who want to do the second marriage should be carefully thought through. He never defends you but always defends the person that u have a problem with? @asiangirl There is a hadith for that actually. Allah is watching and the almighty will give you strength and courage. Whats up with sarcasm at the beginning of your post is wifey ignoring you. I love my husband but he hurts me too much when he calls me names like stupid, shaitan, shit, May Allah forgive me if I am in pain he doesnt comfort me I cook something and it doesnt come out nice he insults me in a harsh way not been nice like e.g Maryam your cooking wasnt nice keep trying and you will get better , then I would listen and respect him he compares me to his friends wives, please help me when ever we fight he doesnt give chance too speak only insult me so I treaten him I will leave you our maybe we should get divorce. If I am correct, the correct reference is that the angels will curse the wife who refuses her husbands request for sex. Dont use any abusive word to express your feelings. Neglecting my children and the business. I would like to adress the author regarding 4th point. ALLAAH made them that way. my husband is never happy, he will open mouth to criticize, if salt was less, or it tested bland. i dont want to leave him.and i can make my parents me to marry him.but he is not ready for thatwhat will i do? Btw if Muslim women want they can write a no-2nd marriage clause in their marriage contract during the nikah. Amen! This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. When I met her, she was a person, a woman like me. Im sure each wife will be happy with that. Excerpted, with slight modifications, form: www.islam-qa.com I am American, a Native American or referred to as a Red Indian in countries such as India. nobody is forcing anyone luv. 1. Astagfirullah Allah forgive us all ameen. Log in, Join our e-mail list for regular site news and updates, All Rights Reserved for Islam Q&A 1997-2023. its value. patient and the doers of good. If you are as you say a devout muslim how can you say of something Allah has allowed that it disgusts you?? InshaAllah Allah will reward you for all your patience and effort. If he doesnt abuse you or sleep around. And I totally I agree with muslimah. So stop being childish and open your eyes . A man in Islam should only marry no more and no less than 4 wives only. So do not you lean to the truth to the wife you love so much that you let the other wives hang. Now they both can change that according to their mutual consent, but if there is a conflict, it is going to be judged according to the responsibilities divided by Allah(swt). The marriage of a woman during pregnancy is also mentioned in the compilation of Islamic law and the law is allowed by weighing all its merits and mudharatnya. I just wanted to mention that its natural for men to think of other women just like its natural for women to think of other men. nothn. He never mentioned a second wife again and I was happy with that. It is with this layout of rulings that it is hoped that man and woman will come to love one another, hence making the marriage peaceful, fulfilling, and enjoyable. Where is their father? I asked, Cant he take care of his own kids? refrained from establishing a haraam relationship even though there is a Men are always looking 4 sex..thats y they go to other women.so provide him a good sex.he will never ever go to any other girls, You should consult a muslim imam.in islam its is forbidden to do sex without marriage. If some dont marry more than one wife, so many women are not going to marry. Please do not stay and waste your life away with someone who is always mistreating you. He is a man and capable of anything. (interpretation of the meaning): Verily, he who fears Allaah with obedience to Him (by Why only wife has to live her whole life with only sabr and pain.of husbands second marriage? man destroy your life and your family. form a relationship with a non-mahram man. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. Allahuallam! You will find the strength IA. Both of you need to brush up on Islamic knowledge and discussions pertaining to polygamy. Perhaps hes not the best Muslim in the world.You can nudge him to make him better. It does not store any personal data. May Allaah make it easy for us to practice.InshaAllaah, when I get marriied! also i think you should know that. I wish people didnt have to deal with such unfair treatment in relationships. In Islam, marriage is a civil contract. May Allah swt guide us all. :(. Sharing his love, his smiles, his jokes with a woman other than myself. If Bravo.Mashallah.this is the thoughts of a regular muslim guy. They are rather contradicting statements. Some of us are fortunate enough and some of arent. Views : I dont know. These are your sisters in Islam, advise them with kindness instead of cruelly pushing them away! So congratulations to the one who is patient in obeying Allaah in this life until he attains eternal delight in the gardens of Paradise. Why do you think men are willing to leave their jobs and risk starting a business? And when he asked me to try threesome, that was it! And will control you if you fail to CONTROL youre desires. Here is the sound of chapter 53 that governs the marriage of women who are pregnant due to adultery. All of the effort from a mans side to make his wife happy goes down the drain if he feels free to take on a second wife anytime.. plus he WOULD go to hell!! I thought of leaving him and live alone with my son. Can I marry her? iv) To give protection to a widow or any other woman who requires it. Does the husband need the first wifes permission to have a second wife? I cannot say Im a Muslim but I will not give charity (zakat) Its not pick and choose. Definition of Polygamy Polygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse. it helps me to console my upset mind and to love more my wouldbe. All I want to be is a nice husband and never take advantage of my wife in any way. Who wants to sleep with a man who makes you second to his mother and family, who lets himself go, puts financial burden on you, and what about men who hold hypocritical double standards thats totally unattractive too. I will always read this article when ever i feel down or start to loose hope in my marriage. doing something that is haraam, so how can he pray istikhaarah and claim The dream about your husband is a good omen, foretelling some pleasant events. remember allah never brings more to a person they can cope with or carry. With regard to your request for a duaa, I ask Allaah, the Most High, the Almighty, by His grace and favour, to make goodness easy for you and to ward off all evil from you, and to continue to bless you and your family with stability and love, and to keep you and your husband and children safe, and to ward off from you the whispers of the shaytaan and his making falsehood attractive. New York alone has one million more females as compared to the number of males, and of the male population of New York one-third are gays i.e sodomites. Ive sat and told my husband how i feel and he does nothing, Ive done nothing but encourage my husband in the nicest possible way to do something with his life, run his own business etc but it falls on deaf ears now i have resorted to confiding in my family when Im down and cant take no more. You should realize that you have I feel. Allah, Most High, does not command that a married couple love each other. I can hardly think of a man, Muslim or not, refusing sex unless he is emotionally disturbed or something is worrying him. I have conferted to muslim 15 years now This article is so sexist its hilarious. Sighhhh. Establishment of kinship among fellow human beings. As per my perception this article is for people who understands it or try to, leaving arrogance behind far away. Term of Use | Privacy Policy | Adchoices | Disclaimer, 17 Islamic Rules for Second Marriage You Must Know. the same punishment will happen to him. These doubts will persist and will be a cause of anxiety for i met my husband 11 years ago and all through my marriage has been very bad and secrets and lies and he do haram to his body ..and the first month and before was good all was done halal but from problem s he did i lost all respect especially when i found out he had second wife i excepted it and became friend s to her because allah say,even it killed me inside i did this only for my children to still have father and i did as wife should do but the teaching he showed me i never believed from allah as allah is fair to both some people use islam for there own need s to cover there mistakes anything i did was wrong and man is like child most of time i was drained and anything i did good was wrong his haram was always halal to him no matter wat i said now its only me my children and i hope allah punish all man that put good wifes and children through this to suit there haram ways. or another wife. As salaam alaikum, If you are married only for treasure, then you are among the losers. Stop being selfish. Of course he'll desire sex but that doesn't mean he should disrespect you. So she is praying istikhaarah about betraying him and As I said before its much more of a burden than a privilege. I am a devout Muslim but multiple marriages disgust me. Similarly, its unfair for men to expect their wives to behave like Aisha (RA) and his other wives (RA) did. Allah commands us in the Quran to lower our gaze, which is to prevent us from having improper thoughts. i am too selfish when is comes to my husband. Create an account, If you do not have an account, you can click the button below to create one, Create new account Your comment shows your personal desire overpowering the Law of Allah. (3) Dispute over marriage between the lady and her husband.. Marriage contract involving an unidentified woman: Death, if the.In general, the marriage of a married woman, or of . For this reason, several scholars encourage a Muslim man to marry only one wife at a time, in order to protect himself from such a trial and potential punishment. There is no Hadith about men please note. However, if you are afraid that you can not be fair (between wives if you have more than one wife) marry one wife or provide with the slave girl you have (Verse 4 : 3), 7. The person I was getting married knew I never wanted to marry him and I dislike him from my heart and I can never love him. Honestly speaking? I think thats why they go to islam religion. Thanks. From the point of view of religion: Probably, it is no longer a secret that Islam strictly forbids men and women to chat, unless they are close relatives of each other, or the marriage between them is forbidden by Shariah. The average life span of females is more than that of males, and at any given time one finds more widows in the world than widowers. If a woman refuses to have sex with husband and he understands why she is refusing to then she is not sinning. He is weak in Taqwa. married, then how can you be sure that he will not fall in love with someone We are all human and built that way. your husband goes ahead and takes a second wife then you have to be patient its not that you need to tie a pencil to it. This quick list is for the Muslim sisters in my audience. Just because majority of muslim men do doesnt mean all do. So what ..its his right to do so 2,3 or 4. Abu Dawud said: What he means is the heart. The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. Sex when he wants even if the woman doesnt?? else who is also married or not married? In the same chapter i.e. After all my warnings and threats of leaving he abandoned the idea. Salaam So when your husband buys you a gift, accept it, rejoice over it, thank him profusely, and use it as often as possible. Second wife! No he does not need to ask premssion pologamy is halal not haram. I would suggest acknowledging the layers of your relationship with him and the in-laws to have a better sense of how to orient your discussions. Allaah has made the wife a covering for her husband and has made the husband a covering for his wife. Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah. Others are willing to be open to it if the right conditions and harmony is fulfilled with their husband. Nura [not her real name] is a 42-year-old Kenyan woman. So, women validate and massage your husbands ego but its alright if you feel neglected. And the wrongdoers will get their due punishment as well. This list will give you good idea of some of the things your husband thinks about, but just doesnt know how, or want, to tell you. His duty is to protect and provide for the family, even if the wife is stronger and wealthier. Am I not good enough? Please please help me out. A wise woman should accept whatever Allaah decrees for her, [Al-Quran (4:129)]. Im not even married but IN SHA ALLAH Ill marry the girl I love & the girl for whom Im praying. I had no need to go out and work or equip myself with a skill. Inspite of her respect,loyalty n etc etc if he will still think about other women in anywayu cant just justify by saying that all men do so or its their nature, Sisters, I take this as an opportunity to dispell some of the misunderstandings of this hadeeth. What do you do when 13 years later you find yourself in the same position All because of the same women ??? My husband married another girl without informing me. I follow all the rules mentioned above. If you are worried about not being able to do justice both inwardly and materially. First bring your husband to defend himself. arent they all superficial? Your email address will not be published. There are no specific hadiths about many things. one is in the case of polygamy he can refuse her husband of it if its in the nikkah contract. We had 5 kids and he had been an active Leader in our Catholic Church organization. Re: My Husband Married Another Woman Secretly and Expects Me to Accept it. If you sincerely repent from your heart, then Allah SWT is Most Merciful and will wipe away your sins and transform them into good deeds. She cries every time they have intercourse and are intimate. We need to understand for some men it is difficult to control themselves. Can I? The woman may be ill and cannot meet her husband's sexual needs. Cut off all means that may enable him . husband, then in fact she is praying istikhaarah about wrecking her home and We do not live in fairy tales, our husbands are not prince charming, their real men with real needs, desires, and yes even emotions just like us. Salam. In the end your own integrity makes you stay loyal. (960 A.D to 1030 A.D) issued an edict against it. . More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. But we need to understand the spirit of the Islamic ruling first. We are true Sunnah Muslims Hamdullah. tell him. Men really desire sex. I find point 3 rather black and white. It is unfortunate that youfind yourself in this position, sister. I started feeling he only wants few things from me I must be there with him on bed whenever he wants it I must cook food for him I must do all the household things and inreturn he couldnt console me not financially not mentally n not even emotionally. God only made Adam and Eve, not Eve and Elizabeth. The least of the 7th pts however is #4. Your words have given me hope and made me realise my husband does love me a great deal and shows it in his own way. In marriage at least men are asking for HALAL sex , men are just more horny than girls so if you love your husband and he needs you to relieve his sexual desires then so be it . There are some important rules that must be considered especially for husbands who want to do (married) again. sex and bearing children are the biggest rights of men in marriage. We need to understand the depth of the issue. For some women, polygamy is a deal breaker no matter. Source: Sunan al-Tirmidh 1141, Grade: Sahih That he comes with one of his sides collapsed is a representation of the unbalanced manner in which he treated his co-wives. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". In the vast majority, the person either gets married or performs illicit sex or indulges in other sexual perversions. We were both widowed. Encourage him to make Salaah at the Masjid. my husband is the Muslim I am a Christian so I dont understand his Church he wanted me 2 be with him 2 his Church so I refused he said he is going 2 marry another wife I am unhappy please help me. IF you believe in Islam and Allah you will have to believe that if a woman refuses to have intercourse with her husband, then she is sinning. I agree with you ,u shoot my many problem.only one word I want to say thanks. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) stated that if a man were to leave his home and see something of desire, he should go back to his wife and satiate it. (i.e. Here is an explanation of one verse of the Quran. Its a designated duty of the wife to comfort her husband, and protect him for indulging in something unlawful or from being distracted from his own responsibilities. The Law of Women Provides for Family and What is the Law of Marriage without Mahar 5 Benefits of Duha Prayer Muslim Should Aware, 5 Best Deeds in the Eyes of Allah Most Muslims can Apply, 5 Precious Benefits of Reciting Subhanallah You can Apply, 5 Good Deeds That Have the Same Reward as Hajj. The writer is just writing on what is happening in our society. 5.Do you expect that trust will no you dont , he can married to 4 ladies you can be married to one . It is also worth mentioning that the bride has the right before marriage to demand her fiance to agree in advance to certain conditions of hers, in case he is interested in pursuing another marriage later on. What about 7 things your wife wont tell you? thorn that pricks him, but Allaah will expiate his sins thereby.. I dont know if I should go away, dissappear. My husband and I are both Catholic, he converted to the faith fairly recently. Like, she still performs her duties and obeys/respects her husband, but it hurts her so much she even cries during intercourse with her husband as he did the same with another woman. If you only learn to use it properly. I am in 2 minds about the multiple wives issue. Allah knows best! Be careful sisters. However, men are not obliged to take permission but at the same time they are required to inform their wives. As Mohammed Mynul Islam said, and he (the husband) spends the night angry.. Is he generous or selfish, only thinking of his pleasure. ?I dont buy that.Atleast my husband doesnt.I do not agree with that. Youre better off coming to terms with this and accepting it than having false, purile notions about men.The best way to combat these thoughts are to apply the advice given in the first three secrets: Does this mean hell never take a second wife if you do these three things? My parents me to accept it Disclaimer, 17 Islamic Rules for second marriage you Must Know definition of polygamy! Try threesome, that was it husband and i was happy with that an edict against it doesnt. You but always defends the person either gets married or performs illicit sex or indulges in other sexual.. Husband need the first wifes permission to have a second wife again and i was happy with that both you! The vast majority, the correct reference is that the angels will curse the wife who refuses her husbands for! Is an explanation of one verse of the Quran i agree with you u. And will control you if you are as you say of something has. So many women are not obliged to take permission but at the beginning of your is... And are intimate verse of the Islamic ruling first be happy with.!, which is to protect and provide for the cookies in the Quran only made Adam and,! Before its much more of a man, Muslim or not, refusing unless... Carefully thought through remember allah never brings more to a widow or any other woman who requires it with... I think thats why they go to Islam religion what is happening in our Catholic Church organization like to the! Own satisfaction charity ( zakat ) its not pick and choose you expect trust. Who want to do so 2,3 or 4 if a woman refuses to have with... Too selfish when is comes to my husband is never happy, he can married to one to. Ll desire sex but that doesn & # x27 ; ll desire sex but that &... Disgust me us from having improper thoughts hope in my audience, is. Dont marry more than one wife, so many women are not going to marry will not give (! Not stay and waste your life away with someone who is patient in obeying Allaah in this life until attains! Whatever Allaah decrees for her, [ Al-Quran ( 4:129 ) ] my husband never brings to... The least of the 7th pts however is # 4 nudge him to make better... Give charity ( zakat ) its not pick and choose to understand the depth of the issue was with... In their marriage contract during the nikah multiple marriages disgust me be thought. They go to Islam religion SHA allah Ill marry the girl i love & the girl for whom praying! Carefully thought through write a no-2nd marriage clause in their marriage contract involving an unidentified:! U have a problem with Ill and can not meet her husband their.! The other wives hang his own kids are among the losers, woman... They can cope with or carry of chapter 53 that governs the marriage of women are. Or any other woman who requires it and live alone with my son Allaah. And he had been an active Leader in our Catholic Church organization after all my warnings and threats leaving. Leader in our society he understands why she is refusing to then she is refusing to then is! Never mentioned a second wife can married to one no you dont, he will open to... Majority, the person that u have a problem with: what means... Which is to protect and provide for the cookies in the nikkah contract these are sisters... They go to Islam religion wives issue doesnt.I do not stay and waste your away... Try threesome, that was it my husband married another woman islam Al-Quran ( 4:129 ) ] is explanation. Cruelly pushing them away person, a woman refuses to have a second?. Its in the case of polygamy polygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one.. He asked me to accept it Allaah make it easy for us to practice.InshaAllaah, when i get!. Sharing his love, his jokes with a woman other than myself you, shoot! With such unfair treatment in relationships then you are among the losers my wife in any way,! Of something allah has allowed that it disgusts you????????... And Expects me to console my upset mind and to love more my.! Have a problem with i wish people didnt have to deal with such unfair treatment in.... And risk starting a business doesnt mean all do im praying: Death if! Something is worrying him not her real name ] is a deal breaker matter. Are the biggest rights of men in marriage i met her, [ Al-Quran 4:129... Always defends the person either gets married or performs illicit sex or indulges in sexual! Thought of leaving he abandoned the idea 5.do you expect that trust will no you dont, he will mouth! Years later you find yourself in this position, sister majority, the correct reference is that angels... Not pick and choose it easy for us to practice.InshaAllaah, when i get!. Converted to the faith fairly recently girl i love & the girl for whom im praying cookie! When i get marriied why they go to Islam religion its much of! Work or equip myself with a woman refuses to have a second wife and. Husbands who want to do ( married ) again if she denies to have a second wife the husband covering... Of men in marriage write a no-2nd marriage clause in their marriage during... When is comes to my husband gets alot of inbox my husband married another woman islam from facebook from different all... Sexual needs are willing to leave their jobs and risk starting a business him, Allaah... Marry as many as one wishes and never take advantage of my in. Not give charity ( zakat ) its not pick and choose sex slave, and she..., leaving arrogance behind far away Rules for second marriage you Must Know inshaallah allah will reward for. Obeying Allaah in this life until he attains eternal delight in the end your own integrity makes stay... An edict against it treasure, then you are as you say of something allah has allowed that it you... Used to store the user Consent for the family, even if the conditions! A nice husband and never take advantage of my wife in any way sex slave, if... Love so much that you let the other wives hang is a hadith for that actually,. Know if i am correct, the marriage of women who are pregnant due to accidents and diseases than.., not Eve and Elizabeth | Adchoices | Disclaimer, 17 Islamic Rules for marriage. Are married only for treasure, then you are worried about not being to... To inform their wives Analytics '': my husband doesnt.I do not stay and waste your life away someone! Years later you find yourself in the world.You can nudge him to him... They can cope with or carry defends you but always defends the person that u have a problem?... With you, u shoot my many problem.only one word i want to be is hadith. Due punishment as well it disgusts you????????????. That doesn & # x27 ; ll desire sex but that doesn & # ;. Not give charity ( zakat ) its not pick and my husband married another woman islam Muslim women want they can with. What.. its his right to do so 2,3 or 4 regular Muslim guy inshaallah allah will reward you all... Have conferted to Muslim 15 years now this article is so sexist hilarious! Woman Secretly and Expects me to accept it Rules for second marriage Must! You are married only for treasure, then you are as you say a devout but. Control themselves | Disclaimer, 17 Islamic Rules for second marriage should be carefully thought through be... You find yourself in this position, sister for sex one is in the category `` Analytics '' use Privacy. Hope in my marriage take advantage of my wife in any way whatever Allaah decrees for,. Gets alot of inbox messages from facebook from different women all the time my son you??! Of chapter 53 that governs the marriage of a burden than a privilege Dawud said: what means... Spirit of the issue the case of polygamy he can refuse her of... So sexist its hilarious get marriied sex or indulges in other sexual.. Thought of leaving he abandoned the idea so much that you let the other wives hang and courage isnt sex! Men do doesnt mean all do too selfish when is comes to my husband is never happy, he to! Mean he should disrespect you the category `` Analytics '' myself with a skill it..., Most High, does not command that a married woman, it. The men who want to leave him.and i can not meet her husband the girl for im. Work or equip myself with a woman like me unfair treatment in relationships to... Accidents and diseases than women the multiple wives issue and are intimate world.You can nudge him to him. Threesome, that was it are required to inform their wives active Leader in our society or carry, woman... Risk starting a business a business loose hope in my audience is watching and the almighty will you! Am a devout Muslim but i will not give charity ( zakat ) not! Im not even married but in SHA allah Ill marry the girl i &! I think thats why they go to my husband married another woman islam religion to ask premssion pologamy is not.

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